Bulma drowsily made her way to the kitchen.  She was about to put some coffee on when she noticed that a pot was already made.

“What did Vegeta do this time?” Bulma wondered. 

    She poured herself a cup and walked over to the window, expecting to see the SWAT Team in action.  That was the usual reason that Vegeta got up early, made her coffee, and was nowhere to be found.

    What she saw was worse.  A huge plane with big wings sat in the driveway.  Two nacels each carrying two jet engines hung under each wing, as did big fuel pods and tons and tons and tons of bombs.  Vegeta was floating beside the thing with a paintbrush in his hand.

    Bulma walked outside without blinking and stared up at her alien husband.  Vegeta was painting something in big black block letters on the side of the camouflaged plane.

“Honey, what the Heck?” Bulma asked.

“You don’t want to know,” Vegeta replied.  He continued to gently stroke letters onto the fuselage of the plane.

“You’re right,” Bulma sighed.  “Let me go get you a First Aid Capsule Kit.”

    As Bulma wandered back into the house, Vegeta finished what he was doing.  He moved back a bit to see StratoSaiya-jin written on the side.

“I love myself too much,” Vegeta mumbled.

“Honey, catch!” Bulma called.  Vegeta caught the small box and shoved it into one of the many internal pockets of his camouflage spandex.

“Holy cow, dad!” Trunks screeched.  He flew up to his father and gave him a big hug.

“You get any closer to it and I’ll kill you,” Vegeta warned.

“Screw you, too,” Trunks mumbled.  He flew away.

“You do need to do some father son bonding,” Bulma said.

“This is my toy.”

“Just don’t…ah, screw it.  You can’t not do anything.”  Bulma found her way back inside.

“Time for some fun,” Vegeta chuckled.

    The Saiya-jin Prince hopped into his jet bomber and let the engines roar.  With amazing precision, Vegeta backed the monster out of the driveway and onto the road.

    Cars frantically swerved off of the road as Vegeta barreled ahead, gaining the necessary speed for take-off.  Horns honked as cars smashed into trees, power poles, houses, and other cars.  Vegeta chuckled, saving his laughter for later.  The plane’s huge wings tore the roofs from nearby houses and downed power lines.

“Up, up, and away we go!” Vegeta shouted.

    The B-52 Stratofortress, with a giant shark’s mouth painted on the nose, tilted up as its speed gave it lift.  The wings, each bearing the emblem of Saiya-jin royalty on the top, went rigid as the bomber became airborne.

    Vegeta was soon over Satan City.  He was just above the tops of the skyscrapers.  Crowds of people stared up at the killing machine controlling the killing machine.

“Boom time,” Vegeta sang.

    He tapped a big red button on the control console.  The bomb bay doors on the bottom of the plane’s fuselage swung open, exposing the uncountable number of bombs stored inside the thing.

“Thank god for dragonballs,” someone below said.

    One small bomb fell from the plane.  It smashed into the middle of Main Street, letting a massive nuclear explosion loose.  A bright light and giant shockwave ripped the city apart.

“Thank god for EMP resistant airframes,” Vegeta said.

“You let Vegeta just take-off in a nuclear bomber?” Gohan screamed.

“What would you have done?” Bulma asked.

    Gohan put his Great Saiyaman sunglasses back on and took off to find Vegeta.

“Hey, Trunks?” Bulma called into the house.

“What?” Trunks screamed from somewhere.

“I will be back later.  I have to go hide in Mexico for a little while.”

“So that was a nuclear explosion…”

“Trunks, it is your dad’s toy!  And since he can pretty much beat the snot out of pretty much everything, I suggest you don’t try to share.”

    Pouting, Trunks went back to applying some of his mother’s make-up.

    A dark shadow crept over the dairy farm.  Herds of cattle looked up and instantly contracted Mad Cow Disease.

    Vegeta pressed another red button.

    Bombs continuously fell from the plane’s wings, punching small craters in the pastures and demolishing farm buildings.  Fireballs filled the air and thick smoke rose high above the land.  The cattle went into a frenzy.

“Okay, now that I have this baby mastered…”

    Gohan flew over Satan City’s ruins, thinking about what to do.  As he circled yet again, his superb hearing detected more explosions.  He shot off for the countryside.

“Breaking news: a massive explosion has wiped out all of Satan City.  Radiation levels are off of the chart.  Few people survived, but those that did described a ‘StratoSaiya-jin’ sky monster.”

“Vegeta,” Goku sighed.  “I assume Gohan is going nuts and Bulma is fleeing the country.  Guess that leaves me and you, Goten.”

“You have got to be kidding me!  I want no part in this!” Goten exclaimed.

“It’s that, or you stay here with your mother all afternoon.”

“So, how do we stop him?” Goten asked.

“Oh, look!  A hospital for mentally deranged meat products!”

    Vegeta let loose a hideous laugh as the building below exploded.

    Goku and Goten raced through the sky inside of their F-16 Falcon jet fighters.  Their blazing afterburners rocked the land as they tried to find Vegeta.  They screamed along at an altitude of well over an inch, at speeds in excess of mach two…upside down and down the main street of a metropolis.

“Vegeta, when I get my hands on your plane, you are going to be wearing one large metal diaper for a long time,” Gohan growled as he flew over the ruined hospital and the emergency crews scrambling about it.

“Sweet!” Vegeta exclaimed.  “Eat this, you political nut jobs!”

    Shimmering silver explosives poured from the B-52 and pummeled the legislative offices.  An inferno consumed the building as the roof caved in.  People panicked and fled, but were caught in the shockwaves of more explosions.

“There he is!” Goku announced.  He pulled up, twisted over, and dove onto Vegeta’s mechanized killing machine from above.

    The tail gun on the B-52 moved.

“Eat this, baka!” Vegeta laughed.

    A stream of bullets was let loose from the tail gun.  Goku turned and dove under Vegeta’s plane, but the bullets followed him.

“Good distraction, dad,” Goten said.  He dove down from way up in the sky, machine guns screaming and missiles launching.

“You interfering bakas!  Let me have my fun!” Vegeta screamed.  He pressed a really big red button.

    Hundreds of bombs fell from the plane.  Their rockets kicked in and they zeroed in on Goku and Goten.

“There they are,” Gohan snarled.  He gave a hand signal and hit the deck.

    The entire military force of the country let loose a barrage of anti-aircraft gunfire, anti-aircraft missiles, and lots of other destructive things.

“No!  Engines are failing!  Wings are falling off!  The fuselage is damaged!  Air pressure is vanishing!”

    Vegeta burst into StratoSaiya-jin (camouflage spandex, face-paint, big wings, and a lot of weaponry).  He ran to the bomb bay and jumped out of his crippled aircraft.

    He pulled a bomb from his belt as he fell through the sky and his plane went down.

“Big Bang.”

“And that, Johnny, is why it is always winter now.”

“Thanks, Grandpa,” Johnny said.

“Yeah,” his other head said.

“Anytime,” Grandpa replied.  He leaned back in his big chair and stretched his arms, legs, and tentacles out.